我有一点问题

为什么会有现在令人反感的感觉？

为什么会觉得不安全？

为什么未来那么遥远，那么的模糊？

Dream Big

I wanna study abroad. #dream

If not mistaken or I should say if everything goes well this coming days I will be going to further my studies next year March? :)

Also, I would like to join the Photography Club when university starts. Hopefully by that time, I have got the guts to join. Guts. Funny huh? I am scary cat. I am no brave at all. Hmm.

About

Faith; what's the meaning of faith?

Long story short - A senior of mine told me to have faith and he had faith on me. He had faith on me when i was in the Prefect Probation few years ago. However, I quit the probation after the interview. Hah. So I got no idea whether I passed or failed in the probation. It's no longer important. The reason I joined probation - I wanna try something new and fresh in high school. So I dragged a friend to join with me. She stayed and I left. The reason I quit probation - I don't like the lifestyle of prefect. Duty during break time and have break time after break time. Anyway, during the probation I got to know a few new friends but we lost contact or became hi-bye friend. This is the cycle, we all know that. During the probation, I didn't do my duty well, I admit. Now. The thing I remember I did during duty was singing Hot and Cold by Katy Perry with few of the probate. Haha. That's why some seniors don't like me and give the kind of STARE.

Back to faith; he told me that he has got faith on me to pass my probation but I guess I gave him a shock after all. so yeah. I broke his faith on me. I don't have faith on myself either.

Faith is believe, to me. Faith, something easy to say, you can say it anytime and you can say it as many times as possible, you can just let the word come out from your mouth but it is really hard to have faith on ourselves and the people around us.

Though I lost contact with him now but yeah, the words are still in my mind.

近日

上网上网；看电视看电视；听歌听歌；炸音响炸音响；发呆发呆；想多多想多多。

我不是自私，只是没你想象的那么伟大。

lights lights lights and more lights!

favourite.

just a few days ago, one of my PART-TIME-DSLR-KAKI asked me how to change the aperture on my dslr.

i...kept quiet. #fail

so, i checked on youtube, i asked zhu wei, i tried on myself and finally i know how to change the aperture and shutter speed as well.

i am damn proud and happy.

must make use of DSLR.

and practice more.

so, yesterday night i found on youtube where this guy did something like what i showed above.

of course he did way better than me. haha.

take more beautiful photossss!

xo.

Chelsea

@Penang, class trip 2011.

with G7.

the little surprise

i received a no name phone call in the afternoon yesterday.

the guy over the phone told me he is from pos laju and he is coming to my house to give me my parcel.

i was alone at home and of course i was kinda scared.

after a while, the postmen came and pass me a little brown box.

i was really confuse and blank when i saw the box;

it came from Johor.

and i don't remember i ordered anything from online shop from Johor.

so, i was really blank. no joke.

then, i quickly open up the box and i saw a bunch of handmade roses in peachy orange colour, which i love it.

at first, i thought my friends from Johor gave me this or it's gonna be a prank from someone.

then i tried to think back...i only told Zhu Wei that i like peach colour roses.

so i called him immediately.

and the mystery revealed.

*smile*

i was really surprised. he did not mention anything in front of me when we are on phone calls or skype. he did not mention a single thing about valentine's gift. lol. am really glad he did this for me. thank you very much. :)

a late surprise, a beautiful surprise that i have been waiting for quite a long time, from a guy i am with now.

xo.

Journey

along the journey you walk through,

have you ever feel lost?

feel lost about the way you have chosen, feel lost about what you are doing?

i feel kinda lost. right now.

i no longer know what is the purpose i treat her good.

i am confuse by myself. pathetic.

i am just one step closer to a happy ending.

but just before the one step, everything ruined up.

everything is gone. gone in a few seconds.

the moment things went wrong, i was so confuse.

i was so confuse.

am i doing the right thing? am i?

nobody knows how i feel. nobody.

one step closer...to a happy ending.

but now, i need to work all over again.

sometimes when we are working very hard to achieve something, we might forget what is the purpose we work so hard to achieve it on the first day itself.

tune in; A thousand years

Valentine's Day Eve ♥

明天就是情人节了。

有人说只要每天开开心心和爱的人在一起，每天都是情人节。

有人说情人节只是个星期二。

有人说情人节是个破费的日子。

不管这么多，这些都不是主题，只是开场白。

刚刚收到一个好朋友寄来不简单的简讯，写着 : Hello friends! Happy friendships week! Well, pretty sure you guys know tomorrow is a special day! I would need you to help me this time. Can you kindly give give Gina a call tomorrow and wish her Happy Valentine on behalf of me? Erm, trying to do something different and feel that 9 friends called and wished her is better than me wishing alone right?

读了以后，你的嘴角有没有微微往上翘？我有。

这个朋友，我从中一就认识他。他嘴巴很大，声音也很大，笑声不输人， 毛发很多，人很聪明，成绩很好，喜欢打扮得像老伯，对时尚毫无头绪，做事有条理，有点吝啬，做事积极，人也长得不错看。但是，长得不错看可是两年前的事了。自从留了一头杂草，'帅哥' 这个名称再也不属于他的了。我们可说是谈得来的朋友吧，总之又什么都可以和他谈谈，但是他都是先酸你多与鼓励你。这种事情我经过太多次了。无数次。已经没有感觉了。

Anyway，看了他的不简单的简讯，我笑了。简讯里的Gina是他的女朋友，也是我的好朋友，是我的谈心伴侣。我可是在旁边看着他们的爱情树成长的一分子。Gina，简单。除了简单，就是单纯。她就是个很简单的女孩。没有心机。我想，这是吸引他的地方吧。长话短说，报喜不报忧。现在看来Gina可是个幸福甜蜜的女孩。旁人也只能羡

慕，嫉妒了。哈。当然，也有一份小感动。

这就是爱。小小心意，花费一些功夫，带来的可是甜滋滋快乐，及老来时的美好回忆。

哦，忘了一点， 那个花样多多，即了一封不简单的简讯的好朋友名叫潘升。多才多艺的好朋友。

在此，我也想借这机会说：我那木那地令我想呐喊的叶祖玮，情人节快乐！

还有，各位，情人节快乐！

this is the best photo i took so far. (to MYSELF)

xox.

Departures

at this moment, once you read through all the statuses on facebook wall.

5 out of 10 will be saying goodbye to the friends who are going to further their studies overseas.

that means it is time to say goodbye which is not good at all.

i don't find goodbye is good. never good.

but it's somehow better than those who don't say goodbye to you or another way round before they leave. that's horrible.

you will find your feeling, yourself hanging somewhere high above the sky.

feeling uneasy to be short.

things change, nothing remains the same as they were.

try to think, when they are back to homeland after some time.

will we be the same again?

...

an i am going to attend a farewell party this coming weekend.

x.

time, something out of our control.

time flies - how many times do i have to say this to myself i wonder. :\

i was looking through the photos in facebook with few of my friends.

the photo we looking through were all took 2 years ago, just two years ago.

but it seems like more than 2 years ago.

it's like we can never go back to the past, we cannot take the same photo with the same people on it anymore.

nowadays, it is quite difficult to gather all of us ( my few close friends ) to talk, laugh, joke, being silly, do something silly etc..

all of us are busy with studies.

when one of them is free to meet up, some of them are busy with things.

sometimes, it is quite sad and frustrated to see that happen.

but that happen most of the time and all of the time. sigh.

anyhow, hopefully we can have a short trip before someone fly off to India.

fingers crossed.

xx.

tune in - I was here

I was here - Beyonce

commit suicide is a crime.